Those who know me know that I'm not really into thinking movies. I would prefer to switch off for ninety minutes (not three hours) and laugh at dumb jokes, cheesy special effects or sexy shenanigans than to have my thoughts provoked and to stroke my non existent beard and say "hrmmmm." I prefer the way-out there and completely unbelievable to the just-might-happen. And I'm so over the Hollywood blockbuster that I'm thinking about turning  heel on Spiderman. Don't make me turn Spidey. Just don't. Lord of the Rings? Hated it. Porky's? Loved it! The Matrix? Don't make me smack you. Virgin Hunters? Could this be the greatest movie ever?

 Well not quite, but its got pretty girls with big boobies and despite the fact that it appears to have a script written by horny fourteen year olds and gaping plot holes the size of the moon, I found it immensely enjoyable and I will watch it again. There's a reason an OOP VHS of Test Tube Teens from the year 2000 goes for an arm, a leg and your firstborn on eBay and Amazon - it's because this movie is just plain ol' dumb soft-core porn fun. That and people just have no idea to look for under its other name: Virgin Hunters. I got mine for less than ten bucks. Score. A few virgins, one hunter, but definitely no virgin hunters. Ten points for a very misleading title. Extra points for girls being on the cover that weren't in the movie.

 Oh yeah. And Chris Wolf is grade A top choice meat. Maybe not now, he'd have to be at least 40. But back in his "Guys Next Door" phase...whoa Momma! Just a side note, who'd have thought the jump from Saturday Morning show for pre-teens to soft-core porn would be such an easy one. Chris you devil you!

A large American conglomerate named Supercorp headed by the super duper evil Carmella Swales (Morgan Fairchild) has took over the world back in the late nineties and banned sex, along with most other things fun that aren't capable of providing them with monetary gain. All babies are created in test tubes. Hence the title. We cut to a scene of our three main characters - smart guy Naldo, muscle head Vin and gorgeous good girl Reena. Despite growing up in a completely unisex environment, Vin is having an awful hard time controlling his impure thoughts about Reena, who is sitting in front of him.

 Cue the first of many imagined sexy scenarios. There's very little sex actually happening in this movie - you'll find most of it is occurring inside Vin's head. The most hilarious example being when Vin & Naldo stumble into the girls shower, and then begins a scene of two completely different girls soapin each other up and gettin sexy. Makes no sense at all.

 Anywho, their seemingly straight laced professor sees the glazed over look on Vin's face (and probably the tongue hanging out of his mouth and the puddle of drool on the desk) and chooses this opportunity to reveal to the three after class that he's an undercover agent of the underground resistance against Supercorp. He also reveals a peace sign drawn on his chest with a sharpie. After filling the kids in briefly of the glory days of sex, drugs and rock & roll and disclosing the location of the secret information vault he's taken away by the most human looking robots that I have ever seen.

Naldo, Vin & Reena head down to the basement to check everything out, but Reena gets scared and backs out. Naldo and Vin find all sorts of relics from the past in there - most notably Playpen (hrmmm) magazine and a time machine! Yes a time machine! Oh the hilarity.

After reading all about a centrefold named Samantha, Vin & Naldo devise a plan to use the time machine to go back in time and stop Carmella Swales from creating the future that they live in. Lucky for them, the girls school that Carmella was headmistress of before taking over the planet is on the exact same site as their school so she shouldn't be too hard to find.

The next day they come back with Reena, so she can program the machine to bring them back, but not long after they leave, Reena is busted by the unconvincing robots and panicking, she jumps into the machine too, setting it a few days ahead.

 The boys arrive safely back in 1994, and end up in one of the dorm rooms to hide out. The occupant of the dorm room, Maggie comes back to find them, and after much screaming, she decides to believe their story and help them - by dressing them in drag so they will blend in. It turns out their radical professor works at the school as well and has a thing for masculine looking females in terrible wigs. Hilarity ensues, but eventually they are able to get him on their side.

After an amusing slumber party scenario where the boys are nearly found out, Naldo breaks into Carmella's office and discovers that her attitude towards sex comes from the fact that she was dumped by a married man. He surmises that if they can get someone else to push her buttons, she won't ban sex in the future. Meanwhile, Vin has found Samantha the centrefold, and well, cue yet another cheesy soft-core scene.

Later, Reena arrives and is unfortunately followed by a blond terminator rip-off named Lex 500 who is there to kill the future kids. Reena meets up with the guys and Maggie and they decide to try killing Carmella, with no luck at all. Maggie has decided she has the hots for Naldo, and the four of them head out to a nightclub dressed very badly. Lex 500 follows them and after a scuffle they manage to capture him and reprogram him to be the ultimate cybernetic beefcake for Carmella, but will she buy it?

Probably, but who cares? Not much actually makes sense in this movie - especially the fact that undoing the future would mean that our three main characters would have never existed, but they don't seem to mind and are quite content to party like it's 1994. Bad hair, bad clothes, good times.