The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra spreads love and may very well one day be
the catalyst for world peace. I'm convinced. Rarely will I award a
B-Movie such praises, but in this case it is 100% deserved. Okay, so
maybe I do claim every bad movie I watch as my new favourite, but this
one has leapt to the top of the pile leaving a pungent cheesy smell in
it's wake.
Eloquent, yes?
Allow me to elaborate. Upon the enthusiastic recommendation of multiple
persons, we purchased The Lost Skeleton, and sadly let it sit on the
"to-watch" pile for far too long. After a bit more prodding along, the
boyfriend and I watched it, and unanimously agreed it was quite
possibly the greatest thing ever put to film. So now, we are the ones
passing on the recommendations. My brother and his girlfriend watched
it, and also loved it and are now recommending it to others as
well...and so it spreads.
I just hope that Larry Blamire will prove to be a fair and just ruler
of the world, and not put that damn grumpy Skeleton in charge.
 Dr Paul Armstrong (Larry
Blamire) and his perpetually perky wife Betty (Fay Masterson), are on
their way out to a Cabin in the woods. Paul is a scientist, who hopes
to find a meteor which has landed in the area recently. He believes the
meteor to be made of atmospherium, a rare compound that would mean real
advances in the field of science! Meanwhile, Ranger Brad meets Dr Roger
Fleming, another scientist who is in the area. But unlike Paul, Roger
is not looking for atmospherium - he is here to wake the Lost Skeleton
of Cadavra! Ranger Brad reluctantly gives him directions to the Cadavra
Cave, and asks him whether he believes in the old stories of the
Skeleton. Roger reassures Ranger Brad that because he is a scientist he
doesn't believe in anything, and heads off to find the cave.
To further add to the confusion, a pair of aliens named Kro-bar &
Lattis have crash landed their ship and accidentally released a
atmospherium soaked killer mutant, who proceeds to go and horribly
mutilate the farmer that had previously helped the Armstrongs find
their way to the cabin. Kro-Bar at Lattis need atmospherium to get
their ship home, and they also need to recapture their mutant before he
kills anyone else.
The next day Paul and Betty head out with an atmospherium detector to
try and find the meteor, and are puzzled when the meters reading begins
to climb, even though they are stationary. As quickly as it came, the
atmospherium they were detecting disappeared, and with an "Oh well,"
they continue their search for the meteor. Soon, they discover their
glowing friend and proceed to take it back to the cabin.
Roger has also managed to reach his goal and found the Cadavra Cave and
the Lost Skeleton (who really wasn't that lost) within. The Skeleton
informs him firstly that he is an idiot, and secondly that he needs
atmospherium to awaken his bones - all that presently lives is his
brain. Luckily for Roger he overhears Paul and Betty talking about
their new atmospherium meteor as they pass the Cadavra Cave, and he
begins to plot ways to get his hands on it.
 Kro-Bar and Lattis also learn
of Paul and Betty's scientific discovery and use their transmutatron
ray to change themselves into normal looking humans, so they can sneak
into the cabin and steal the atmospherium. Deciding that their ray gun
would be too much of a giveaway that they were "not from around here",
they leave it in the woods. Roger finds it and decides to use it to
turn some forest animals into a date for himself, before he visits the
Armstrongs, so he won't look so suspicious.
Kro-Bar & Lattis head to the cabin, and upon meeting Paul and
Betty, give themselves earth names: Bamin and Tergasso. Betty mistakes
them for the Taylors, who own the cabin and invite them in for a drink.
The Armstrongs don't seem too bothered by the strange behaviour of
their frightened alien guests, despite them making constant references
to outer space and aliens. Before long, Roger and Animala arrive at the
cabin (calling themselves Rudolph and Pammy Yager), so Betty, being the
quintessential 50's housewife invites these complete strangers to stay
for dinner.
Kro-Bar and Lattis know nothing about Earth eating customs, so they
decide to copy everyone else at the table in order to not be found out.
Unfortunately for them, Animala is the first to eat her food - and she
doesn't know much about eating like a human either. After dinner Ranger
Brad stops by to warn the couples about the horrible mutation of the
Farmer down the
road, before heading out to become a victim himself.
 Both the Aliens and Roger and
Animala begin to get desperate for the atmospherium as time is running
short. Things start to get out of hand when both Kro-Bar and The
Skeleton both use their mind control technique on Betty to make her
give them the meteor, which causes her to faint. As Paul tends to his
wife in another room, Roger tells the aliens that he knows the truth
about them and hatches a plan for them to work together to steal the
atmospherium. Roger however, is evil and double crosses them - stealing
the meteor and awakening the Lost Skeleton of Cadavra. The aliens
realise their mistake and tell all to Paul, but is it too late to stop
the evil Skeleton? And will they be able to stay out of the mutants
murderous
clutches?
This movie is an absolute satire masterpiece that looks and feels as if
it were made in the 50's. The score is absolutely sensational and the
film is filled with small touches that you notice with repeated
viewings that just make you love it more. The actors deliver "bad"
dialogue expertly, and this movie literally had me in tears laughing
all the way through. if you're a fan of cheesy old sci-fi movies, and
even if you aren't - this movie is definitely worth a watch. I
anxiously await the next instalment - THE RETURN OF THE LOST SKELETON!!!
|
|
Year: 2001
