Cherry 2000 is somewhat of a
B-Movie staple, that's why I'm ashamed to admit that the first time I
saw it all the way through was last night. We bought it at a DVD
bargain sale for about $8.00 (that's about $6.00 for you Americans), so
it was a pretty good deal. The movie itself is highly watchable, with
an interesting and quirky story that flows well and doesn't really do
anything to try to shock you.
 Cherry
2000 isn't the name of Melanie Griffiths character, as much as the
cover of the DVD and her flame red hair might fool you. Cherry is the
robot "wife" of the straight laced Don Johnson-esque Sam Treadwell,
from Anaheim. Apparently there is something incredibly hilarious about
being from Anaheim, but I just didn't get the joke. Sam thinks he's in
love with Cherry and at the beginning of the film it seems like he has
every right to be. She's beautiful, caring, smart and most of all
subservient and extremely randy. After a romp on the kitchen floor goes
awry when the sink overflows, Sam is left with one very waterlogged and
non functional Cherry. When he takes her in for repairs he is told that
he may never find another Cherry 2000, as they are considerably rare.
But there is one chance. Find a tracker by the name of E. Johnson and
get them to go into the ominous sounding Robot Graveyard in Zone 7.
Although it is extremely dangerous, for love struck Sam, it is the only
option.
Sam heads off in search of E. Johnson, expecting a hardened crusty old
tracker. When he finds an attractive redhead female, he doesn't feel
that she is up to the job. But when he gets himself in some trouble
with some thugs trying to steal Cherry's highly valuable memory chip he
realises he may not have much choice and the two set off in Johnson's
rocket powered Mustang (kickass!).
The area surrounding Zone 7 (the leftovers of Las Vegas) contains a
number of completely whacked out people. The most whacked out of them
all being Lester. Somewhat of a cult leader trying to build his vision
of a utopian society out in the desert in his Sky Ranch, which is
nothing more than a series of weird dome shaped buildings and a dirty
swimming pool. Lester hates Trackers and is a complete psychopath,
which only means trouble for Sam and his quest.
 Sam
and E have a number of run ins with Lester's thugs resulting in Sam
meeting Six Fingered Jake (a legendary tracker) and getting kidnapped
and taken to Sky Ranch. When Sam wakes up at Sky Ranch he is dressed
horribly and strangely enough meets his old girlfriend Elaine who has
changed her name to Ginger and is living a stepford-esque existence
amongst the blue domes as Lester's main squeeze. From the sounds of
Elaine/Ginger I can understand why Sam would invest in a Cherry 2000.
Elaine tries to convince Sam to stay and that everything is great at
Sky Ranch, but Sam can clearly see Lester is a maniac, after he plays
target practice with a tracker that looks like Stephen King during
dinner. With some careful manoeuvring, Sam escapes and runs into E, who
has just come to rescue him. He also learns that Cherry's memory chip
is lost.
Meanwhile the sexual tension between E and Sam has been growing, and
she has fallen in love with him. After a car accident he puts the moves
on her, but finds Cherry's memory chip in her pocket mid grope. Angry,
at E, Sam forgets all about what he was just doing and sets off to meet
up with Jake so they can continue their journey. The pair stop at a
roadhouse boasting the sign "Last Chance Gas & Brothel" where they
meet up with Jake. The old man and the hooker running this place claim
to be friends, but radio Lester of their whereabouts without them
knowing. With E's car a wreck, she decides to get an old plane running
so that she and Sam can fly into Zone 7 and get the Cherry.
 The
plane works and E and Sam get out of there in the nick of time, sadly
losing Jake in the crossfire. They make it to the robot graveyard and
find a Cherry, but when trying to escape they discover the plane too
heavy. Sam now has to decide who gets out of the plane. E or Cherry?
Pamela Gidley was absolutely beautiful in this movie and I wish she had
made more B-Movie trash so I could celebrate that fact more. I really
enjoyed the way that Cherry seemed to have a personality in the
beginning of the film but when reactivated her personality seemed
completely programmed. I've never been a fan of Melanie Griffith, but I
must say she was quite attractive when she was younger. I also find it
strange that her male co-lead looks a lot like Don Johnson (except for
the mole on his forehead which I just couldn't stop looking at), who
Melanie was married to on two separate occasions (the first at 14!),
and her characters surname is Johnson. But this movie was made in
between marriages to Don Johnson - while she was married to Steven
Bauer (Manny from Scarface). Very interesting.
There was some very strange, somewhat misplaced violence too - a point
blank execution and the aforementioned target practice, but it really
did help to illustrate Lester's extremely unstable mental condition.
Most versions of the DVD are heavily edited, so you're not likely to
get any gore.
A fun movie with an inevitable happy ending. I even overlooked the plot
holes and abandoned sub-plots. You will too.
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Year:
1987
